#2 Weirdest Christmas song: that is one disturbed kid: Department Store Santa

I will not discuss politics or religion in this blog. This is just a Christmas song with a disturbing department store Santa and an even more disturbed little kid. To be perfectly honest, it’s not a song, it’s more of a skit but it isn’t any less disturbing for it.

This was written and performed by Len Maxwell, a voice over artist and comedian who also voiced Punchy, the Hawaiian Punch Guy. In this bit he does his best Peter Lorre. It is from his album “A Merry Monster Christmas.”

Imagining Peter Lorre in a Santa suit is disturbing enough. Part of his fame was playing a child killer in the classic German film “M.”

This kid doesn’t want a sled or a ball. He wants a new head for his daddy. You read that right A NEW HEAD. Without his head this boy’s father trips a lot. The boy finds this funny. This boy also wants an electric chair for his daddy. Not because he wants to electrocute his father but because his father likes grilled cheese sandwiches. But I wouldn’t trust this boy with an electric chair.

His family is ashamed of his brother so the kid asks Santa for a dark room to keep him in.

I mean he is thinking about other people than himself and that is good, but he wants a king cobra snake and a flute and he then starts attacking Santa when Santa says he can’t promise anything.

It ends with the omnimous words “Little boy, you’re next.” Just plain weird.


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